Saturday, 23 August 2008

How Not to Apply

After my two very long posts it's time for another short and light post.  On the same page of the print Guardian as my Nosing About post was an article giving advice on how to, and how not to, apply for jobs.  This post lists some of the "funnies" seen in applications.

One applicant wrote the following in a covering letter:

"Hope to hear from you shorty."


Another boasted:

"I possess excellent memory skills, good analytical skills, memory skills..."


Yet another, who, it seems, wasn't as sure as they believed, said:

"I am someone who knows my own destiny but I have no definite long-term plans."


One must be careful not to claim to have had too much responsibility in a previous job.  The following candidate did not follow this advice.

"I was closely involved in every aspect of my former company, right up to its bankruptcy."


I think it is safe to assume that none of these four applicants was offered a position.


  1. So is this practical advise you are following at the moment?

  2. Oh the pitfalls of writing job-applications!

  3. I don't think I will show those to my friend who is looking for a job ;-)

  4. Goodness!! I have taught people who, when I tried to correct their CV spelling, said, "It don't matter, tho', do it?" and looked at me as if I were mad for worrying about it.