Sunday, 23 November 2008

At It Again: More Destruction

A few months have passed since I told the tale of my destructive tendencies in a Youth Hostel but I was at it again today!
The entire Carr family travelled through to the West to visit the children's grandfather, my father-in-law.  We were only due to stay a couple of hours and the first 110 mins passed without incident.  This was not to last.
Just before we were leaving I went to the toilet and I noticed that the bathroom light didn't work. 
No!  I did not break the toilet seat.  I'm a man.  Well, I was the last time I could see past my belly.  I pee standing up.
No!  I did not pee on the floor.
I peed normally into the bowl and I went to flush the toilet and the button went down but no water appeared.  The button was stuck in the down position and could not be pulled back up.  I raised the cistern lid a little and the buttons returned to their correct position but again no flush.  I lifted the cistern lid off the cistern and replaced it - still no flush.
I went downstairs and told my father-in-law. "It worked for me," said Mrs Carr  and my father-in-law chimed in with, "You didn't lift the cistern lid off, did you?  It's very difficult to refit".
"Shit!"  I thought - fortunately - to myself.  "Oh, by the way, your upstairs lights don't work"
"I'll just have to reset the circuit-breakers" and as he flicked the reset switch there was a pop and a flash.  Clearly there was a major problem with one of the lights but which one? As we talked round the problem I mentioned that I had switched on the lights in his lounge.  "I never use that switch." 
God, how was I to know. All I wanted was to bring light to the room and I trip all the bloody lights.
We didn't stay.  We left with the house largely in darkness and with no flushing toilet. 

Will I be welcome back at my father-in-law's?
Will I be welcome anywhere?


  1. I was going to invite you round for some shepherd's pie but now ...

  2. Bloody hell! That's the quickest comment I've ever had.

    Pity about the shepherd's pie. You could either put it in a bowl outside your house or - rather safer - would be to post it to me.

    You choose.

  3. Clearly non of this was your fault ;-)

  4. It's just a typical old house Calum, none of your doing. Not much of a handyman are you?

  5. I think your father in law needs to have the wiring checked! Sounds a bit the way my Dad used to carry on. He was full of erudite information like "Electricity leaks to earth" I told him once that I couldn't get the doorknob to work. "Oh, the string's broken" he said.

  6. Keep an eye out for the postman struggling with a heavy package ...

  7. Thanks for that post on bodily functions, Calum. I was just serving up a steak pie and veg. :)

  8. Anger flashed briefly in Mick’s eyes at that last remark. He glared at Ria, but at the sight of her tears now flowing freely down her cheeks, his eyes softened and his face sank, his remorse at hurting Ria dulling any offense he had taken. He stared at her, not knowing how to respond.


  9. Re your latest post: give yourself a slap from me and tell yourself that Liz says to pull yourself together, man! I didn't even get to see the post you so speedily deleted! So let us judge.

  10. I did see it and thought it was a fantastic photo. But you were so speedy in deleting, I didn't get the chance to comment!