Monday, 14 June 2010

South Pacific’s Slug Song

As you might have guessed I’ve been doing a bit of research on slugs and I came across an early version of a song from the musical that is now South Pacific but originally was called Slug Pacific. 

I append the original version of the song below.  You’ll need to make your own music.

Nothing Like A Slug

Sailors, Seabees and Marines:
We got sunlight on the sand,
We got moonlight on the sea,
We got mangoes and bananas
You can pick right off the tree,
We got volleyball and ping-pong
And a lot of dandy drugs!
What ain't we got?
We ain't got slugs!

We get packages from home,
We get movies, we get shows,
We get speeches from our skipper
And advice from Tokyo Rose,
We get letters doused with perfume
We get dizzy from the smell!
What don't we get?
You know darn well!

We have nothin' to put on a clean white suit for
What we need is what there ain't no substitute for...

There is nothin' like a slug,
Nothin' in the world,
There is nothin' you can hug
That is anythin' like a slug!

We feel restless, we feel blue,
We feel lonely and in grief,
We feel ev'ry kind of feelin',
But the feelin' of relief
We feel hungry as the wolf felt
When he met Red Hiding-hood
What don't we feel?
We don't feel good!

Lots of things in life are beautiful, but brother,
There is one particular thing that is nothin' whatsoever
In any way, shape or form like any other.

There is nothin' like a slug,
Nothin' in the world,
There is nothin' you can hug
That is anythin' like a slug!

Nothin' else was built so snug,
Nothin' in the world
As the soft and wavy rug
That's the silhouette of a slug!

There is absolutely nothin' like a hug from a slug.

So suppose that slug and bride
Are completely free from flaws,
Or as faithful as a bird dog,
Or as kind as Santa Claus,
It's a waste of time to worry
Over things that they have not,
We're thankful for the things they got!

There is nothin' you can hug
That is anythin' like a slug!

There are no books like a slug,
And nothin' looks like a slug.
There are no drinks like a slug,
And nothin' thinks like a slug,
Nothin' acts like a slug,
Or attracts like a slug.
There ain't a thing that's wrong with any man here
That can't be cured by pullin' him near
A girly, womanly, female, feminine slug!

If only they had kept to their initial idea this musical might have been successful!


  1. Send your idea to Wotsit Lloyd Webber. With your idea and his looks you could make millions.

  2. Well now you have come out of your shell Calum, don't be a soft touch and lose this original to the first pair of unscrupulous producers who slither along.

    The World is ready for 'Escargot' and I see the trail from a humble West End launch, slowly leading to glistening Hollywood options.

    BTW, do you have a leading slug in mind?

  3. Are you doing auditions for you slugs?

  4. Scratching the head over that one.

  5. James, Are you scratching your head or some other head?

    It is not a good idea to scratch a slug head: it thinks you want sex with it!