Monday, 23 August 2010

So Nearly a Blog Death

Yesterday I said that I would describe the changes I was making to this blog.

There are none.

But this blog came incredibly close to being shut down; not mothballed as I have done before but ended …. for ever.

Why, then, is the blog still here?

Because I’m not strong enough to do so.  This unreal world of blogs is a haven away from life as it is, should be.  I can make little, or no, progress in real life whilst the unreal is so powerful.

Closure would have been a powerful statement of my intent to move forward in my life  - or so I would like to think.  More likely, though, is that it was a message from the overbearing power of depression that nothing has value.

I write not for sympathy nor for disdain but to describe how and where I am.

In case any are worried, death of this blog is the only death under consideration.

Underneath my weakness is a strength that has seen me stumble through years of difficulties.  I am not about to stop stumbling now.

The blog’s survival is still very much in the balance and I cannot know what will happen in other todays.


  1. I'd say why shut down when it's just as easy (easier actually) to wait until things may feel better. A rest, to return hopefully refreshed, perhaps.

  2. I am shocked to have to say it but Andrew is right.

  3. Yes Andrew is right. I seem to be saying that quit a lot lately!

  4. I am shocked to have to say it but James is right.

  5. Oh, and so is CherryPie, by the way, but that doesn't shock me.

  6. I'm talking seriously and the comments are reduced to banter!

    Says it all!

    No wonder I feel like shutting down the blog. Nothing is real here even when it is meant to appear so.


  7. People mean to help, I know I do, but to avoid apparently upsetting you again (and not for the first time) I shall desist. Good wishes and good luck.

  8. We all have a different perspective, of course. But sometimes, Calum, the people I meet through some blogs are more real to me than my next door neighbours. Simply because I have very little in common with the neighbours when it comes to what truly matters to me. Most wouldn't understand what I love. Very few would offer what my heart and mind need on certain days. I'm often surprised, and deeply grateful, to find it on some blogs.

    I'm not sure I could keep a blog going for a great lenght of time. So I understand that you could be tired. Whatever you decide, let me thank you with all my heart for many of your music posts. I had a very enjoyable time listening on my own, and with friends. Your comments are always insightful. And it's been nice, at times, to share the way I felt about the artists and composers.

    Take care, Calum. All the best always from Canada.

  9. Andrew All that is required is a bit of thoughtfulness.